New Voices: By and about young adults

When I lived in London, I picked up a Grove Booklet (a publication series on contemporary religious ideas) on “Taking Ordinary Theology Seriously” by Jeff Astley and Ann Christie. I was astonished to discover that many regular church attenders do not believe in traditional Christian beliefs.

From the in-depth study of 45 Anglicans in North Yorkshire, which led to the booklet’s publication, only 20 percent of those interviewed believed Jesus was fully God and fully divine, and only 13 percent believed in the substitution theory of atonement. Those interviewed were not a fringe of the church—though they were not in ministerial leadership, they were regular, active churchgoers.

By registering my surprise at reading about the “ordinary theology” of these average Anglican church attenders, I realized I had been assuming that church was a place for believers and that those believers were in agreement on their faith, as promulgated by the pastor in sermons. I noticed a clear disconnect between what I subconsciously believed from experience and what I articulated theologically. Even though I articulated that all people were welcome in church, regardless of their place of their spiritual journey, I still felt that everyone in church largely agreed with what was being said from the pulpit (hence why there’s such a variety of churches).

During a hiatus in church attendance, I spoke with a friend about my decision not to attend church. I explained that it felt false to be participating in church, that everyone else would think I believed something I didn’t. I also left out of a sense of integrity, since there seemed rarely an opportunity for an honest discussion of beliefs. I explained to my friend that I’d probably attend church again one day, but it would happen only when I felt I could sign on to the full package.

My friend encouraged me to go to church anyway. If church was only a place for those who had all the answers, she said, what would be the point? I slowly learned there were small but significant numbers of people who were part of Mennonite institutions and leadership who didn’t necessarily sign on to traditional Christian orthodoxy or agree with everything in the Confession of Faith in a Mennonite Perspective. Even though these people didn’t believe everything that was suggested to be established truth, they felt a firm calling to their denomination or ministry.

After my hiatus, I began attending a congregation that openly welcomed a variety of beliefs from its congregants. It was refreshing to be part of a congregation where I didn’t have to worry about fully agreeing with what was said from the front, and where open discussion of beliefs was a welcome part of the life of the congregation.

I’m just now catching on to something fundamental about church life. Being a part of a church doesn’t mean “you’ve arrived” or solved all your questions about God, Jesus and how to live in the world. It just means you go to church. For each person, the reason is different—feeling a part of something greater, social connections, ritual, nourishment and challenge, opportunity to worship, opportunity to proclaim and renew belief. Of course, some people have deeply held Christian convictions and don’t go to church at all (but that’s a discussion for another time).

Once we’ve been baptized and proclaim belief, do we stop having questions? No, we’ve just promised to attempt this journey to the best of our abilities and search for meaning and faith led by Jesus.

I felt discouraged when I realized I had the assumption that you had to believe in order to go to church. How constricting it must feel if you have to sign an internal creed in order to participate in church life! What about those days when all you have are questions? What about those days when you’re truly not sure what you believe?

How can we structure church life, and daily life, in a way that welcomes all of us—recognizing that none of us will ever have all the answers and that we’re all merely trying to journey forward? How can we have more honest conversations about our beliefs and questions in a way that welcomes rather than constricts or disenfranchises?