Five things Friday roundup: When church is difficult

different pairs of hands on a brown tree trunk There are ways to connect with your spirituality, even if you’re finding it difficult to be in church. — Shane Rounce/Unsplash

In these trying times, I am encountering more people who are having difficulty with the institution of church. If now is not a time when you can worship in church, that is OK. If you’d still like to find ways to connect with your spirituality, I have a few suggestions from personal experience. 

1. Connect in nature

There are Wild Churches that worship in nature. This might be an alternative if being inside four walls feels confining. Grounding ourselves in nature can help us connect. This could mean admiring beauty, getting exercise or having time with our thoughts, doubts, fears and hopes. This connection that can be found outside of church is as easy as your backyard. 

2. Connect with people

If worship is difficult, there may be people in your church community who would enjoy meeting with you one on one. You may also find connection in your small group. You may have friends you haven’t spoken to in a while or other deep connections that you can lean on. When times are tough, it’s easy to isolate. When we are disillusioned with church, it can be hard to be around the people we are used to. I encourage you to find safe people with whom you can connect.

3. Connect through spiritual direction

Not going to church does not mean you need to divorce your spirituality. Spiritual directors can serve as “priests” to us when we don’t know where to turn. They can help during a crisis of faith or help sort out complicated feelings with Christianity or religion in general. Good spiritual directors honor people where they are on their journey. You are likely not the first person to come to  spiritual director with problems with the church. Directors are trained to help you navigate the emotions that come with a need to disconnect from a faith community.

4. Connect with other communities

God can be found in many places, and it doesn’t have to be a church community. A book club, a dance class, a yoga class or a group of friends can all help us connect without some of the baggage associated with church. God created us to be in relationship with one another, and life outside of church is no exception.

5. Connect with yourself

Not attending church events can give us a chance to be with ourselves. We are fearfully and wonderfully made, and if we’re stepping back from a community, there is likely hurt to process. Journaling, therapy and directing ourselves towards goals can give us more self-awareness. Awareness of self is important on our spiritual journeys. There may be practices you can engage in to help you find your own spiritual path, which may not be connected to a church institution. God wants us each to grow. 

Joanne Gallardo

Joanne Gallardo is conference minister of Indiana-Michigan Mennonite Conference of Mennonite Church USA in Goshen, Indiana. Originally from northwest Ohio, Joanne Read More

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