Amnon said to Tamar, “Bring the food into the chamber so that I may eat from your hand.” So Tamar took the cakes she had made and brought them into the chamber to Amnon her brother. But when she brought them near him to eat, he took hold of her and said to her, “Come, lie with me, my sister.” She answered him, “No, my brother, do not force me, for such a thing is not done in Israel; do not do anything so vile!” But he would not listen to her, and being stronger than she, he forced her and lay with her.   2 Samuel 13:10-12, 14

If you’ve read my other Faithful Living and Eating Columns, you know I believe food (from communal feasts to mindful solo meals) can restore us in spirit and relationship. But as violence rages in Gaza, Ukraine, Sudan . . . this violent story featuring bread came to my heart.

What’s your healing comfort food? Chicken noodle soup? Rice and dal? Kuzu pudding? You’ve probably noticed that healing power increases when a kind person brings this treat to your bedside.

Amnon only pretends to need his sister Tamar’s bread for healing (a set-up to get her alone at his bed). The deceit and cruelty of this story witness to the deceit and cruelty that millions of people are experiencing today, right now, as you read these words.

Bread of Life,
We call for you in our need.
Meet us in our hunger.

Bread of grief,
Kneaded by Tamar’s fists,
Meet us in our sorrow.

Bread of hope,
Unleavened on the run,
You travel in our pockets.
Feed us away from revenge, toward true freedom.

Bread broken
            Broken blessed
                          Blessed shared
                                         Shared devoured

In our daily, persistent, gnawing, growling need,
Meet us in bite after bite.

You’ll find more rabbinic literature and biblical commentary exploring how Tamar and Amnon may not have been biological siblings (so at least it wasn’t incest?!), than on how Tamar’s life unfolded. The star of the ongoing biblical story is their brother Absalom, and his avenging murder of Amnon two years later — at a dinner table!

God gives us daily gifts of companionship and nourishment. You may not have abused these gifts to Amnon-extremes, but pause, now, and consider: Amnon asked for food when he knew he longed for something else. What hungers are beneath your cravings?

• a headache or fatigue feels to me like a chocolate craving.
• loneliness feels like wanting mashed potatoes.
• the despair of making one more phone call or sending one more message to my legislators, asking them to stop sending weapons to Israel (knowing they will absolutely keep doing it anyway) feels like cravings for Netflix and nachos.

In solidarity, try this Middle Eastern comfort food. Meghli is a festive rice pudding for Christmas and the birth of babies in Palestine, Lebanon, and beyond. Caraway is beneficial for breastmilk, but if you’re not breastfeeding and don’t like caraway, you can skip it!

Mix dry ingredients in a medium pot:

• ½ cup rice flour
• ¼ to ¾ cup sugar (traditional recipes call for the high end, but it is very sweet)
• 2 tsp. cinnamon, ground
• 2 tsp. caraway or anise, ground
• Pinch of salt
• Optional: cardamom, nutmeg

Pour in four cups of water. Turn on heat and whisk until pudding thickens. Turn off heat and allow to cool until safe to pour into dessert bowls or small glass jars. If you’re using heat-safe glass (like Pyrex dishes or Ball jars) you can pour right away, as long as the glass is at least at room temperature or a little warm.        

When pudding is room temperature, add any of these toppings:      

• Pistachios (can be soaked in watered-down rosewater for amazing flavor)
• Coconut flakes
• Slivered almonds

Some recipes suggest soaking the rice flour in water for a couple hours before making the pudding. You can do this if you have time, using about one extra cup of water total (soak in two cups, add three cups for cooking).

Use (dairy or plant) milk in place of some of the water, for added nutrition and richer flavor.

Is there a Middle Eastern or Asian grocery store in your community? Finding rosewater and other special ingredients is an opportunity to meet new people and support a local business.